Who I am...
My Belief
I believe that I am loved by the most gracious God. I am completely accepted by Him as I am. I am given a purpose to live each day. My desire is to embrace my uniqueness and to live courageously and authentically. There is still a part of me being afraid to be freely me. My daily practice is leaving the past behind and finding who I am, and moving forward to the future knowing that God is with me no matter what.
My Focus
Life
Work
Faith
Healthy living
Relationships
Leaderships
Cultural awareness
Women’s ……… You name it!
My Life
Many times, I stop and wonder how I got here. I was born in Japan but now I live in the US, work at a US university, drive in the crazy California freeways, live in a house, and - oh yes, speak English everyday. However, the funny thing is, when I go to Japan, I am totally a foreigner to my own people. Did I ever imagine my life would be this way? That thought did not even cross my mind. I thought all I needed to do was to follow everyone’s instructions and I would be set for life.
From a very young age, swimming, tennis, basketball, and softball came very natural to me. My interests were different from my two sisters’ and it certainly gave my father a lot of headaches. Studying was not my highest priority, just PE and English. To this day, I am fascinated by God’s sense of humor, seeing as nobody else in my family has a master’s degree except for me.
In my Japanese home it was typical that verbal affirmation, love, and encouragement were hardly given, but the expectations to be likable, accepted, and obedient were clearly enforced. In order to feel safe, I chose to hide my feelings, thoughts, and questions from those whom I longed to be known by and should have been the most truthful with. Mentally, I had created an image of the person everyone thought I should be and tried to maintain that image at any cost.
By now, you have probably guessed how this turned out. Anxiety, stress, depression, and fear and I were inseparable. Thankfully, I decided to seek help. Many different therapy sessions, along with my inner conviction that I needed to get out of that state of mind, have slowly opened my heart to realize who I am, not who the world wants me to be. In spite of still seeing myself in a dark light and being in my daily struggle to move forward, somehow I started seeing beauty and the possibility of change.
I can promise you that my life has been filled with ups and downs and I am glad to say that I have come out of each struggle with a new strength and hope. But most of all, I am amazed at God’s unconditional love and faithful grace. I am definitely work in progress.
