Why are we so consumed with the idea that others perception matters so much more than our own?

"shame is about perception. Shame is how we see ourselves through other people's eyes. When I interviewed women about shame experiences, it was always about 'how others see me" or "what others think." And often, there is even a disconnect between who we want to be and how we want to be perceived." - Brene Brown "I thought it was just me (But it sin't)" Pg. 82.

Is it from the fear of rejection? Pursuit of perfection? Unspoken expectations? Why things are not real control us so much of how we act and how we feel?